A Tug in the Milky Way
A Tug In the Milky Way (Revised) Stars are little tugs carrying heavy loads of winter squash and white Macintosh. Men like me shiny beside the road, lonesome Pawnees and the unemployed. Steaming...
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The stars ride on 18 wheels carrying heavy loads of winter squash and golden Macintosh. Men like me beside the road, lonesome Pawnees and the unemployed. Cities black as London in the blitz. Early...
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Almost a list poem. The last strophe brings it all into focus. and a cerulean street is just what a poet would have pissed his life away into. I read this as a list of places/things a poet harbors.
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yes, exactly, Cyn---thanks for the needed assist.just can't seem to get this formatting down. i rarely try any tricks in that regard. thanks again.mojave
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if you have wordpad, or notepad or some such, you can just paste from Word or the Mac equivalent into notepad (or whatever) and make sure it's as you want it, then just cut and paste to the posting...
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Hi - I'm not sure which version is THE poem - Bernie's or Cyn's. Please tell!
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SJ---working my little heart out.the revised poem is posted.say, with so much french talk in the last poem---have you seen the P diddy/Annie Liebovitz Vogue spread? Last Train to Paris---promo for...
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Very nice poem - charming as those Klee paintings with the far-off figures waving. Although I know what Cyn means by calling this a list poem, I'd call it more collage, I think. I love that first...
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SJ---well the manuscript is gone. a little improvement in that Mexican town line---i think.still want that "cerulean" street --- reminds me very indirectly of leonard cohen's Famous Blue...
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wow. a 19 times edited poem! That must be some sort of record. I like the work ethic. A slight niggle right off--macintosh. are they ever golden? They're def. white inside, and red outside, as far as...
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strangely enough, I was just relaying a Leonard Cohen story on another board, in which he explains that when Adam and Eve don't meet in him, face to face, God is not on his throne, you don't get off...
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O---when a lady is right, she's right.so, longer and hopefully a bit more musical. 16 changes? well, now it's 24---i've got to get a life.thanks for your guiding remarks.mojave A Tug In the Milky Way...
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you know, i don't usually see the revision (online) process working to the extent we might gloriously wish it would, but I think it must call forth your muses, (for you seem remarkably blessed) and...
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O---very nice thing to say. thank you.well, posted one more revision. i too think the poem is better for the time we have invested, but anxous to tell you about my neighbor that i know only from her...
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